Plainfield teen's plea: 'My dad needs a kidney'
Tens of thousands of people around the country are desperate for organ transplants, at least 1,000 of them in Indiana alone.
Johnny Parker can be forgiven for caring about just one of them.
"My dad needs a kidney."
That's how his email plea to me began. Those five words were enough to grab my attention. So I called him.
Johnny is 14 and an eighth-grader at St. Susanna Catholic School in Plainfield. He loves wrestling and football — a lot, he says.
He loves his father more.
John Parker Sr. is 45 and desperately ill. Born with kidney disease, he had his first transplant 14 years ago. Now, that kidney is rapidly failing, and Parker is one year into lifesaving, but also life-changing, dialysis treatment. Three days a week, he rises at 4 a.m. and heads to the hospital in Danville for the four-hour blood-cleansing procedure.
It's a grueling way to start the day, but then Parker must head to work. He owns Parker Seal Coating & Paving in Plainfield.
Johnny is telling me all of this on a Monday afternoon because his father doesn't know that the teen has taken it upon himself to find help for his dad.
"He is a brave man, and he's hard-working," Johnny said. "I see how hard this is on him and how he sacrifices for us. I want him to see me graduate and go to college."
Johnny is president of the student council at his school and the only child of John and Shane Parker. Two months after Johnny was born, his dad received his first kidney transplant from a deceased donor. It was Easter Sunday, a new beginning for the family. There were some initial health setbacks, and the elder Parker spent his first Father's Day in the hospital. But eventually the family settled into a comfortable life.
Before last year, they traveled frequently to wrestling competitions around the country, and Johnny's dad almost always made time to attend practices and football games to cheer on his son. Last year, as his donated kidney began to fail, Parker was in and out of the hospital seven times. He lost more than 70 pounds off his 230-pound frame.
Since he began dialysis, he's feeling stronger, but it continues to take a toll on his overall health. He has to stick close to home, not only for treatment but also in case he gets the call that he and his family are hoping and praying for: that a kidney is waiting for him.
Parker has been on the transplant list for a year. Dr. Tim Taber, medical director of transplant nephrology at IU Health and also Parker's doctor, says patients on the list might wait three to five years for a kidney.
"A patient's life expectancy doubles after a transplant," Taber said. "There's a huge need for donors."
A living donor kidney offers the best chance for success, but Parker, who was adopted as a baby, has run out of options within his family. In fact, Taber said, most organ donors today are not blood relatives to the recipient, so family is just one option.
Johnny would step up and be tested in a heartbeat, but he's too young to donate. The minimum age is 18.
So he turned to Instagram and Snapchat to ask for help, and then he contacted me. "My dad is a great father and husband," he wrote. "He works hard every day, and I want to see him get a kidney."
Others have tried to help. A teacher and the father of a fellow wrestler both were tested to see if they could donate, but neither was a match.
That's where the Kidney Paired Donation Program comes into play. If someone needs a kidney transplant and has a living donor who is not medically compatible, he or she can register with the program so that an “exchange” can be arranged with other living donor/kidney patients. The program is run by the United Network for Organ Sharing (UNOS). Find out more at www.unos.org/donation/living-donation.
Shane Parker said she thinks the pairing program scares some people away. "They think they'd be giving their kidney to a stranger, but it could still save my husband."
I spoke to Johnny's dad the next day about the teen's mission to find him a kidney. He was overwhelmed.
"This just blows me away. I can't believe he's doing something like this," Parker said. "All this time, I've never seen him shed a tear. Even when he was little, he hardly ever cried. Now, he's at that age where he doesn't want to talk to us."
But Johnny had plenty to say to me about what a good dad he has and how he misses the old days when the two hung out more.
"That just chokes me up," Parker said. "I'm so proud of him."
If you or someone you know is interested in learning more about kidney donation, call the IU Transplant Unit at (317) 944-4370.
Meanwhile, the family leans on its Catholic faith to see it through.
"When you're in church, you don't think about the bad," Shane Parker said. "I feel like I'm at peace when I'm at Mass, like something good's going to happen. Some days are really rough, but you have to have faith."
I asked Johnny what his dad says to him about his health.
"He tells me everything's gonna be alright."
"Do you believe him?"
"Yeah."
Noteworthy
Red hats for babies: The American Heart Association is kicking off this year’s Little Hats, Big Hearts campaign by collecting knitted or crocheted red baby hats to be distributed to babies born in hospitals throughout Indiana during February, American Heart Month. Hats will be collected through Dec. 31. Volunteers can visit www.heart.org/LittleHatsBigHearts for hat patterns and more information.
The American Heart Association is looking for hats in both newborn and preemie sizes, made of yarn that is red, cotton or acrylic, medium to heavy weight, and machine washable and dryable. Donations of yarn are also accepted. This is the second year of Indiana’s Little Hats, Big Hearts program. Last year, the Heart Association delivered 5,000 baby hats to more than 40 Indiana hospitals.
Donate old cellphones: Colts fans and visitors to Lucas Oil Stadium are being asked to donate their old cellphones to HopeLine from Verizon during a game-day collection Oct. 30. Wireless phones are recycled to generate cash grants for local nonprofit domestic violence prevention organizations. Donations made at the Indianapolis Colts-Kansas City Chiefs game will benefit survivors who live in transitional housing at Coburn Place in Indianapolis.
New phones from HopeLine — complete with 3,000 minutes of wireless service and text-messaging service — also are provided to local domestic violence and law enforcement agencies for use with their clients. More than 700 phones have been provided this year so survivors in transition can stay in touch with families, schools or doctors.
Volunteers needed: The Spirit & Place Festival needs nearly 100 volunteers to help with 40 events Nov. 4-13. Learn more about Spirit & Place Festival events here and sign up to volunteer here. For questions, contact Maddie Brogan at (317) 464-9389 or maddie@maribethsmith.com.
Call IndyStar reporter Maureen Gilmer at (317) 444-6879. Follow her on Twitter: @MaureenCGilmer.